Today I presented to 100 GP practice managers about how New Leaf Recovery and Wellbeing College improved my well-being. That in itself is the most pivotal part of my story. Because six years ago, I didn’t even have the self-esteem to contribute to small team meetings, let alone lead or present at larger ones.
In the past, I failed at delivering training. I couldn’t speak up when reprimanded for things I didn’t do, and I certainly wouldn’t have shared my story on live radio. I even cried at the thought of reading books to preschool children. At the time, I was in my early 30’s and I felt pathetic.
I always had confidence in myself, but depression fogged my brain, created filters, and turned me into a shadow of myself; and the knock-on effect stunted my self-esteem and my career.
However, after completing the student development programme, I started to get involved in small activities that aligned with my goals of increasing my self-confidence. Each time I took on one of these anxiety-inducing challenges, my self-confidence soared afterwards. Slowly, the filters began to perforate, and I was letting more positivity in; until now: when I’m not even hesitating to agree to challenges. The contrast is like day and night. And I’m proud of my achievements.
I’m still afraid sometimes; I worry about failure and humiliating myself. But I’ll do it anyway. I’ve learned that whether I fail or not, there is value and benefits to pushing myself outside my comfort zone. Three years ago, I cried about reading to preschool children. Just look at me now. Presenting to a large group of important professionals. Thank you, New Leaf Recovery and Wellbeing College; for the opportunities, for pushing me and for believing in me.